I might die after christmas

Ok, so that a little over the top. But I have good reason for thinking this.  I’ve order a Luke Skywalker Ep V Master Replica Lightsabler from play, as they are on sale for £30.  It was a bargen as its RRP is £80, so Im happpy, and being a geek its one of the things I’ve longed for all my life.

Heres the thing Lynsey isn’t a geek and doesn’t like sci-fi, but for her husbond (that still sounds so weard) she will watch Star Wars (and admitted it wasn’t as bad as she thought it would be).  But she does try (and secceds) in winding my up by asking when the “Enterprize” (Like it would stand a chance against Rough Squadren and the falcon) will appears and when Kirk will snog princes Leagh. So She thinks it pointless got get one, but I dont so i got one.

Next time we meet up Byty it will be me and you lightsablers at the ready

RAGE

Ok so I’ve always been protecive of Lynsey, but now I’m her husband im in over kill protection mode.

This has never more true than today.  There is a self obsecived, slut of a chav whore, how let her 2 year drink gin and let her older daughter say and do what she wants (looks like she will be the same as her mum), that lynsey works with.

When said whore frist start at the same time as Lynsey they where friend, but the whore changed.  Now Lynsey will talerate her in work but has nothing to do with her.

But it turns out the whole has no morals and will always attack when the person is not there to defend themselfs.  That has happen, She has accused Lynsey of being a bully at the work place.

BOY WAS THAT AFUCKING BAD IDEA.  Now Lynsey as to and defend herself.  It might not look good for Lynsey, as the whole sucks up to the line manager, and invites everyone in the office out except Lynsey (not that we would even go to her council estate house).  

 If any think happens to Lynsey, I’m going to bring a few home trouse to her mangers boss about the office, how the whore gets special treatment, how the whore screemed at Lynsey for no reason in the midle of the office, how the whore cann’t do her job right, how she made lynseys life hell.

I’m going to have to do something I can just sit here

Fuck it I really need to kill her, not in a ninja style like Bytey, more in a FUCK YOU BITCH WHORE as i let loose with a million punches to the head.

The Big Day

Its the morning of wedding and both myself and Lynsey are up at about 8am. Im off to get my brother, bytey and dad for turkish shaves, and lysney head over to her fokes to get ready.

My dad decided not to get one in the end. We arrive at the turkish barbers for our shaves, now there is a funny setup to this, I’m first at 9am, then a half hour gap before my broter and then bytey, So I get shaved and we head accross the road for some breakfast, ony place to eat was a rankans cafe, which is an up market coffee house that also sells food.

I can fell my narves starting to go and I’m look at my watch every 2 or 3 minutes, I’t anoying Bytey so much that he said if i look at my watch one more time he’s going to rip my arm off.  Everyone get shaved and we head back tomy fokes house to get dressed. 

When we get their my Mum has had her hair done and is dressed and Andrea is getting her hair done.  I’m given a glass of bubblie by my dad and Mathew arrives and is handed a beer.  I had a sip of the bubbly and change it for a beer and then my mum said” dont you be getting drunk”.  OK so every calls my a light weight but my god a sip of beers not going to kill me.  Then my mum starts going on about the time and we have to get ready.

We all get ready and everyone is looking pimp. the car arrives and some photos are take and then off to the alter.  I’m getting photos taken, doing last minute checks, meeting and greeting, time comes to start at the front of the room.

At this stage my Hands start to sweet, but the nerves are still holding.

Everyone is in, both the Mothers are in first to light candles, (nerves are still holding, just) then the brides mandes come in and stand at the front (nerves are stilll holding, bearly) then the music changes, there is a huge mirror in font of my and I’m trying not to look in it, but I catch a glimps of Lynsey, I then turn my head and there she is walking down the Ile, My god she is stunning, (body to nerves where are you, nerves to rest of body that it were out here), the rest is a blair of the seramoney, photos, speaches, dancing. 

It was an amazzing day.

The Big day, the lead up to it

Well its all over, my single days are dead and burried (thank god, I never want to go throught all that again) I’m a HAPPLY MARRIED man.

The run up

The week before was a nightmare for both me and Lynsey, stress, last minute arrangements.
It wasn’t that bad. We had do the last minute arrangements, conferm time of cars, check that the photographer knew what time to be there, make the order of service and get bytey in his suit.

So heres how it played out. Monday I’m working and lynsey is get her hair sorted, Tuesday I’m working and Lynsey is stress about her hair and getting her wedding dress sorted.

Wednesday I’m not work, I’m having to get up at 6 in the morning to get Bytey and Andrea from the airport, and its the international airport, so its about 9.45, 10 o’clock when we get back to bangor, drope Bytey and Andrea at my fokes house and mum makes breakfast. I get Lynsey form home and we head to my fokes for some breakfast and then into Bangor to get the stuff for the Order of service.

Thursday was the one day when all hell nearly borke loos.
As we had got most of the part for the order of service, we also had all the suits and a lot of things we thoguth we had to do had been done, we went to get the Cake. MY GOD how in f*&)’s name can it be so stressfull picking up a bloody cake, Marks and Spencers can make it that way. First off the ladey at customer service has no Idea that a cake is really for collection let a lone been ordered. This starts to worry Lynsey, but Lynsey had all the documentation with her (something I wouldnt have had) and we get it sorted. Now I dont meen to be condacending but how in the name of everything that is holy do not f*&(ing see a 3 foot high cake, made up of 3 seperate cake boxes tide together with sicker on top with all the details and Lynseys name on it???
SO we get the cake and are checking it, theres no rod to hold it in place, M&S are like, we sorry but they have to be there, at this stage I’m seeing red, but Lynsey put the point accross (where as I would have only yelled at them and made them out to shit) that they are not there. M&S give us the name of a lady in local cake making shop who can give us the rod and help us out. They must do this all the time as they prackically had her number on speed dial. This gets sorted and lost of call to make user that the cheifs at the Old Inn can fit the rods properly. The rest of the day was spent mostly creating the order of service, Which Lynsey made and they look amazing and everyone said how professional they where. I finished off the last minute tweeks need the to font size and style.
I started to print them off, Now at this stage I was starting to sweet a bit as computers never really want to work properly when you want them to, but Rebellion did my prouid. I decided to print them off in batch of 5 that way we wouldn’t loss to many if anything did go wrong.
About 9pm I go round to my fokes to tweek my speach, and spend an hour or so with Bytey and Andrea as I’ve not seen them at all that day as they went to Belfast.

Friday morning comes run and we have to be at the Old Inn Crawfordburn for the wedding rehusile with the cake, table plans, instructions on what to do and how we want things laid out. All goes well and everything get sorted out. Bytey and Andrea hang out with us for a while, then Lynsey not happy with her hair style goes back to the stylest to get something else sorted out. Most of the afternoon is spent chilling and playing PS2 with Bytey and Andrea, much fun was had by all.
Lynsey and I spend the rest of the night together alone.